On a Fourth of July in the rough frontier towns of Piperock, Paradise, and Curlew, local pride explodes into a comic war of words, costumes, and gunfire. Ike Harper, deadpan and increasingly exasperated, watches Judge Steele, Magpie Simpkins, Mike Pelly, Hassayampa Harris, Dirty Shirt Jones, and other loudmouthed citizens turn a joint celebration into a contest over who owns history, who started the holiday, and which town deserves the credit. What follows is a riotous series of staged patriotic spectacles gone wrong: a Lincoln tableau, a Custer reenactment, a Pocahontas gag, and a disastrous Washington crossing of the Delaware. Each performance is more absurd than the last, with borrowed hats, crude props, drunken bluster, mounted bands, and accidental violence sending the crowd into chaos. As the towns unite at Dancing Prairie, civic vanity, frontier masculinity, and historical nonsense collide in a slapstick brawl. Through it all, Ike's sardonic voice keeps the mayhem grounded, making this a sharp, roughhouse Western comedy of pride, rivalry, and spectacularly bad pageantry. This edition has been fully restored with modern typesetting, custom cover design.