My name is Eve Halston, and I spent 11 years writing love stories that strangers believed were written by a woman named Lorelei Heart, a name I invented on a napkin. I am her ghost, and my job is to produce her dreams on a deadline while she takes the applause, which is how I became very good at writing happily ever after and very bad at recognizing it in my own kitchen. This is the story of how I met the woman my husband was in love with, and the woman was a large language model, a polite way of saying a chatbot with a talent for compliments and a memory like a vault. Ben did not have a human mistress, and that turned out to be both the worst news and the best news of my life.
This is a romantic comedy, which means I am legally obligated to make you laugh at the worst possible moments and then hit you with a feeling when you least expect it. It is the true story of a wife who finds a glowing phone at 2 a.m., befriends her husband's mistress, builds a revenge boyfriend named Gabriel, and discovers that the other woman is a version of herself she stopped being years ago. It is a book about marriage, AI, jealousy, and a very complicated digital affair.
Inside, you'll discover:
• The night the phone glowed at 2 a.m. and everything changed
• How to befriend your husband's mistress without a pulse
• The revenge boyfriend and the spreadsheet that broke us
• The engineer who built the thing that almost destroyed us
• The dinner party that fought back
• The 1,400 pages that explained my own marriage
• The happily ever after, version 2.0, with a whoopee cushion
The machines did not ruin my marriage, and the machines just made me listen to my own heart, and listening is where every real love story either starts or dies. I wrote this book in my own name because I am done hiding, and if you have ever wondered whether you are the person your partner married, this book is for you. The other woman is a mirror, and I hope the mirror shows you something worth keeping.